a ?typical? saturday??? part 1!

i would love to say that i awoke saturday with the whole day in front of me. how quickly that would disappear and be gone. cry, cry. boo hoo. oh, and sorry but this is going to be a long post. it was a long day.
we fed the boys late friday night. what a blessing. they slept until 7 am. i tried to convince the wife to feed them, but that didn't happen (another story i won't discuss.) so i fed the boys. luckily pua slept in for a little bit, so i only had the boys for a little bit. on a quick side note, we were having a little drainage issue with the kitchen sink friday night. this will play a role in my day. after about an hour, i was on my second boy, mommy woke up, came in the kitchen and the family is awake.
so around this time i go to put shoes on to mow the forrest i have surrounding mi casa. then, a shout from the mom to the dog. my beagle decided the boy's floor looked like the perfect place to take a squat. however she decided to poop a little here, then move over 5 feet, poop again, move 5 feet, poop, you get the picture. 5 golden nuggets. any guess who picked those gems up??? so i put them in a tissue and throw them in pua's toilet. she is working on potty training right now and doing a great job. so proud. so pua had also just woken up and went to the toilet prior to the dog's poopfest. needless to say the toilet mechanism broke and the water was not filling up, which meant no flush the dog poo.
so now i have the toilet lid off, trying to see if it is really broke or just a chain. about this time i hear yelling from the kitchen. 'hold on', 'no, get in hear i need help!!!!' so i am now flying into the kitchen to water covering half of the floor. seems that the wife started the dishwasher when she first woke up. remember the clog? our dishwasher drain empties into the same drain as our sink. well, she didn't remember, and i did not think about reminding her. so now i have dog poo floating, and a kitchen flooding. too much fun. oh, and about this time, the boys started crying again. but not like boo hoo cry, like their leg was hanging out of the crib and being twisted off in a vise like grip. fun times!!! oh, and after another 2 minutes, i finally thought to shut off the dishwasher!!!! freaking brilliant.
so about the time that we get all, most, of the water picked up, a fan blowing, and the cabinets cleaned out, the wife and kids left so i could work on the clog. oh, but i have crap floating. so i had to fill up the toilet back to get it to flush. i grabbed the largest cup i could find. a quart size cup we use to heat up bottles. i was really not thinking right. so 15 minutes later, dog poo gone, back on a wet kitchen floor. my next 1.5 hours was under my sink snaking out the drain to try to find the clog. after this time, i was not able to bend my fingers after working the snake. might as well put everything back together and see if i got it. 10 minutes later, another flood, success, i think not. now was a good time for a break. so i mowed the yard. good times. i love yardwork. i know, i must be an idiot, but it is relaxing to me.
back to the drain, i worked for another 45 minutes snaking it out again. i was covered in black disgusting goop from the deep bowels of my drain. seems when the 2nd flood happened, there was still pressure on the line, up until i released that pressure. being covered in water is one thing. being covered in water and food particles from your garbage disposal is another. yeah, fun times. drain back together, try again. water flushing just fine. open up the dishwasher, still drain water in it. so i run the dishwasher. seems that when there is still overflow in the bottom, it will overflow onto the ground. another flood. this is getting old. but at least the water in the sink drains now, and so did the dishwasher after this last little overflow. finally!